Stanley Kubrick - Lolita - disengagement from my memory is key.

My first impression of this 1962 film was pretty much "horror" ! It seemed to contradict all my memories all my imaginative dreams of Lolita and Humbert from my vision of reading the book (it is one of my favourites) everything was wrong. I wanted to turn it off... but then I realised.
This is a bloody good film - I just need to take it as a separate world, a separate story. . . was I really expecting a nine year old graphic sexually charged Lolita in 1962?
This film is actually hilarious!.



sorry about the subtitles but all had been disabled...

How could they ever make a film of LOLITA?

Playing God: Deitism: Motherism: Creationalism: Genesism - The transcendence of self

To be an artist is to be God?
The act of creation is in my power. As an artist my role to continually create. A sense of "giving birth" with my hands, my mind, my eyes and my soul. Is this a power I need to learn to grasp and control or is the energy infinite? Is this my own God delusion? By God I mean in the broadest sense of the word. Perhaps. But ..maybe this still is something all more human. It comes back to being a nymph or maybe just the power of being a girl. The passing on of my energy. The beginning of something unknown? The birth of potential? A parent to what... an idea?  Maybe this is my legacy.. what I leave on. The purpose to life is creation and the artist is the ultimate creator. The fulfilment of life or the power of being. As a "god" my creation has free will... to exist in the world as it itself intends. I ignite the potential. Maybe reach some kind of transcendence or eternal existence as the shadow of my creation leaves its mark on something to be found somewhere forever. As I become my art I become not only the creator but the creation. The purpose of myself to create existence and then the art JUST TO EXIST? Again just "TO BE".
I am an energy. "GOD" is an energy. Art is an energy. You are GOD.
                                                         This is just my continual search to try and understand.

Yohji Making Waves

Photographs taken from Yohji Yamamoto's installation at the Wapping Project.

In the stillnes she quivered, 

A reflection on her loss.

She echoed a beauty across the lake

And under the moon light she sung her siren song.

To be in that moment and then gone again.

Ephemeral ghostly peace. 

Me and my CAMERA...

Film made in a couple of days whilst on residency at Trinity Buoy Wharf


Up against the wall; Down a dark alley from Elizabeth Ophelia Alice Rose on Vimeo.

Dancing in that white space

Up against a brick wall

Choked up

When the lights stop flickering

You are left with nothing but the howling waves and thrashing wind.
The nature is violent but it is where I belong.
Not locked up in this
Caved
Ceiling
Choking
Cell.
Prisoned.


        Prisoned.
                 Prisoned in windows and reflections.


I am locked in the droplets of water you can no longer see because they are engulfed by the storm.
Lost in cracks and crevices
In crumbling walls.
Keep walking down the tunnel.


Keep on walking.
There is NO END






This water will have you trapped.


She is not doing it on purpose but in this desolate place it is so easy to get sucked up into time.
Time that you can’t put your finger on because it goes back further than the beginning of the universe.
Start before the ancient myth began.
Poseiden didn’t exist without the sprays that she controls.
I laugh.


I laugh.


I laugh at you.


I laugh out of pity because it is all held inside her heart.
She can’t.
          I can’t even understand because the re-incarnation of her history hasn’t come into play yet.
I know something.
But not everything.

The lock on the truth is fear.


She haunts your eyes.
Her eyes haunt you.
Her eyes are haunted.


Her power is lost in her frail body.
The scream too strong.
Screaming wind is too choked up inside her chest - her limbs - her head .
Dancing. Jerking. Swaying.
Stillness.
Beat upon beat upon beat upon beat
Drum
Drum
Death
Drum.

This life is ephemeral but the truth transcendent.
In this dark room I remember the white light of the past.
Another time when she looked with different eyes.
On different things.
Different bodies.
Different minds.
Different fragile hearts.
The thing is - You want to save her.
She doesn’t need saving.

That is you.

The Mermaid

The mermaid
Silver vision
Ephemeral sapphire sea
Swimming in darkness she steals the world...
Fantasy?
Fiction in the eyes of the beholder
This beauty bathed in waves
She sings for eternity
No reason to doubt if you can believe
Down there in the deep she can reveal the light
Myth or madness - she has your heart
Transcend the earth and you can live
Step in to the ocean and become
Float free with these waved
Become full of current and crave love
Water whirls
Hold it in your heart
Diamond dream.

Untitled (work in progress) A first video

A first attempt at trying to get some of what I feel down on film. A feeble attempt, with very rough footage, no technical skill whatsoever and "I-movie" is rubbish... if anyone can help me out with some better software that would be much appreciated

flesh and blood

human fault
we are all naked underneath
THE END

Grey block

red blur

nymph: a manifesto (work in progress)

1. A Nymph can be many, all, one or none of these things.
2. The definition of Nymph is in the eye of the beholder.
3. A Nymph transcends  the spiritual ordinary.
4. A Nymph transcends the human but is human.
5. A Nymph is an aura of "beauty".
6. A Nymph is undefined sexuality.
7. A Nymph is amoral.
8. A Nymph transcends time.
9. A Nymph is timeless.
10. A Nymph is natural.
11. A Nymph is not natural.
12. A Nymph doesn't belong.
13. A Nymph appears fragile and attracts through fragility.
14. A Nymph commands power.
15. A Nymph feels pain and thrives on it.
16. A Nymph suffers and commands suffering.
17. A Nymph blinds.
18. A Nymphs beauty is her pain.
19. A Nymph makes the end desolate.
20. A Nymph is water, fire, air and earth.
21. A Nymph is written in history.
22. A Nymph commands art.
23. A Nymph is one soul, many minds... connected.
24. A Nymph is troubled.
25. A Nymph is flesh and blood.
26. A Nymph is spirit.
27. A nymph is youth.
28. A Nymph is lust.
29. A Nymph is love.
30. A Nymph is love lost.
31. A Nymph is trapped.
32. A body is a prison.
33. A Nymph cannot define her actions.
34. A Nymph is words.
35. A Nymph is pictures.
36. A Nymph is a journey.
37. A Nymph is sex.
38. A Nymph is death.
39. A Nymph is undefined tears.
40. A Nymph is a dream.
41. A Nymph is a nightmare.
42. A Nymph is a song.
43. A Nymph is a ghost of the tangible.
44. A Nymph is ephemeral.
45. A Nymph is lines.
46. A Nymph is intrigue.
47. A Nymph is obsession.
48. A Nymph is falling.
49. A Nymph is special.
50. A Nymph is destroyed.

nymph: a definition

I guess the time has come when a definition was needed. This is a dictionary definition; rather brief and vague. Short. Hard... this is not my definition. Now I need to define it myself.


nymph  (nmf)

n.

1. Greek & Roman Mythology Any of numerous minor deities represented as beautiful maidens inhabiting and sometimes personifying features of nature such as trees, waters, and mountains.

2. A girl, especially a beautiful one.

3. The larval form of certain insects, such as silverfish and grasshoppers, usually resembling the adult form but smaller and lacking fully developed wings. Also called nympha.

---

[Middle English nimphe, from Old French, from Latin nympha, from Greek numph.]

---

nymphal (nmfl) adj.

The journey continues...

Fallen Nymph

When she falls in love
          she falls
                she falls
Because she is not free.

Not her who has trapped
She is trapped.

Trapped by her
                   heart
No power
Lost

Not that she ever desired power
that is expected
Just
     the chance to
                         escape?
No decisions
No blocked pathways
The journey unknown
       the future e n d l e s s . . .

But she
she is a girl
         a girl
         a life.
Wild bird
Wild thing.


                But love
                She loves
She kills for             love
Not            kills
But something
                     something dies.

Violent life
Violent ends

All
Just
Love

Blood nymph

Blood drips

Sickly scents of sacred sapphire


                                                      Streams.


Her blood drops
                        Diving and dreaming
Beautiful Blindness


An
     END to the suffering
The search for sensation

To be loved

To be loved

To be loved

The purpose to be loved.

                                     The pain dissipated with the scarlet poison as it stains the white
page

Page after page.
A search for some kind of soul
To cling to
                To live.


TRANSCENDENT BLISS

She cries
She screams
BLISS






No feeling.






Ancient ancient dazed marble veins
Bloodless blood
Pureness Cleansed
Pureness Cleansed


Censored Pureness

ghost

constallation

Nymph 3

Dripping and
dragging
Rivulets;
revolting rivers of revenge
She sees
She does not see
She knows not what this is!
Blue dreams?
Hot cold dreams?
Fires freezing minds .

Energy
Ecstasy
Endless eternal misery
Fleeting moments of love
Or just the desperation the desire the burning need
To be loved
To be loved
God
To be loved


Screaming scorching running searching
To be loved
To be loved
To be loved
Or to feel

Not the huntress
Not preying
THE PREY

Not what she seems
Not what she seems
She just needs.

Lost in eternity
Dancing with time
Everlasting life not feeding but draining every last hope

She tries
She tries
She tries to find

Black emptiness
Screaming hollow emptiness
White Blackness

No END

Love me?
Love her
No luck
No end

drip

Nymph 2

Ephemeral beauty
Lost translation
Blue Dream
Unseen Fiend
Fiery flush
RUSH
rusH

girl child
WILD WILD

Tempting temptess
Golden Empress

But who or what?
.. Not feeling "if" ANYMORE.
Screaming
Churling
Sinful Seduction
Body not recognised
Humanity unknown.

Age old devestating desire
Catching
Crippling
Sleey sighs of the soul,
GLITTERING GAUDY GAPING GASPS
Gripping tight
Breathing light
Whisper searching
Violen violation
Pounding, passionate, pushng pain.


HEART BREAK

Commandig
loving
hating
Creature

NATURE'S SISTER.