john and yoko

make or break?

save or surrender?

kill or cure?

jabberwocky

jabberwocky
Jan Svankmajer - 1971



and my dreams are getting wierder

yay

happy hippie
pink poodle

birthday

today is my 19th bithday.
Born in Bristlol hospital 6 weeksearly weighing 4 pounds 6 ounces at 11 o,clock on the 27th June 1991...
it has been a journey but I know have a life I have was dreamed of.
I love my family I love the people around me that matter but most of all I love my beautiful fiance/ brother/ best friend/ best thing that ever happened to me.
xxx

nude

degas


... and I am again off to life draing at the lovely 40 winks for an eeing of late midsummer madness. what a lucky girl I am :)

the road

ther are many kinds of roads. maybe we wont encounter them all...
this one scared me



our future is so unkown and their are so many dystopian possibilites. Our society is narrowly balncing and it could so easily be tipped over. The prospect is disturbing and we have to ask ourselves how humanity would cope or even what humanity means? Do we know ourseves and are people good or evil? naturally) What is the fre...and what do children mean. Even what life is worth living...

Now I must read the book

A clan of names I will always idolise...

Jude
Orlando
Ariel
Gabriel
Isaac

Lolita
Juliet
Sienna
Sophia


and i know I will have forgotten one... it iwll come back to me... they always do.

Star dust

'And it came to me then. That we were wonderful traveling companions but in the end no more than lonely lumps of metal in their own separate orbits. From far off they looked like beautiful shooting stars, but in reality they're nothing more than prisons, where each of us is locked up alone, going nowhere. When the orbits of these two satellites of ours happened to cross paths, we could be together. Maybe even open our hearts to each other. But that was only for the briefest moment. In the next instant we'd be in absolute solitude. Until we burned up and became nothing.'
from sputnicks sweeheart


we really are no more than dust and energy a life built out of nothing has to be something and even for the briefest moment we have to make it something

midsummer

If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding, but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend;
If you pardon, we will mend.
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearnéd luck,
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long:
Else the Puck a liar call.
So good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.
(puck A midsummer night's dream)

I wonder what tonight has in store.. mischief and magic...

Heart Art

castle

I have my own humble abode and one day it will be my dream.

The Tower

THE TOWER
Basic Card Symbols

A tower on a rocky outcrop, a powerful bolt of lightning, one or two figures falling from the tower, sometimes waves crashing below.

Basic Tarot Story

As the Fool leaves the throne of the Goat God, he comes upon a Tower, fantastic, magnificent, and familiar. In fact, The Fool, himself, helped build this Tower back when the most important thing to him was making his mark on the world and proving himself better than other men. Inside the Tower, at the top, arrogant men still live, convinced of their rightness. Seeing the Tower again, the Fool feels as if lightning has just flashed across his mind; he thought he'd left that old self behind when he started on this spiritual journey. But he realizes now that he hasn't. He's been seeing himself, like the Tower, like the men inside, as alone and singular and superior, when in fact, he is no such thing. So captured is he by the shock of this insight, that he opens his mouth and releases a SHOUT! And to his astonishment and terror, as if the shout has taken form, a bolt of actual lightning slashes down from the heavens, striking the Tower and sending its residents leaping out into the waters below.

In a moment, it is over. The Tower is rubble, only rocks remaining. Stunned and shaken to the core, the Fool experiences grief, profound fear and disbelief. But also, a strange clarity of vision, as if his inner eye has finally opened. He tore down his resistance to change and sacrifice (Hanged man), then broke free of his fear and preconceptions of death (Death); he dissolved his belief that opposites cannot be merged (Temperance) and shattered the chains of ambition and desire (The Devil). But here and now, he has done what was hardest: destroyed the lies he held about himself. What's left is the bare, absolute truth. On this he can rebuild his soul.

Basic Tarot Meaning

With Mars as its ruling planet, the Tower is a card about war, a war between the structures of lies and the lightning flash of truth. The Tower, as Wang points out, stands for "false concepts and institutions that we take for real." When the Querent gets this card, they can expect to be shaken up, to be blinded by a shocking revelation. It sometimes takes that to see a truth that one refuses to see. Or to bring down beliefs that are so well constructed. What's most important to remember is that the tearing down of this structure, however painful, makes room for something new to be built.

Thirteen's Observations

No card scares a Tarot reader like the Tower - or the person they're reading for if that person knows anything about Tarot cards. It is however one of the clearest cards when it comes to meaning. False structures, false institutions, false beliefs are going to come tumbling down, suddenly, violently and all at once. What's important to remember as a tarot reader is that the one you're reading for likely does not know that something is false. Not yet. To the contrary, they probably believe that their lover is being faithful, that their religious beliefs are true and right, that there are no problems in their family structure, that everything is fine at work...oh, and that they're fine. Just fine, really.

Alas, they're about to get a very rude awakening. Shaken up, torn down, blown asunder. And all a reader can really do to soften the blow is assure the Querent that it is for the best. Nothing built on a lie, on falsehoods, can remain standing for long. Better to tear it all down and rebuild on the truth. It is not going to be pleasant or painless or easy, but it will be for the best.


THIS WAS MY PAST

looking for a home...

home (hm)
n.
1. A place where one lives; a residence.
2. The physical structure within which one lives, such as a house or apartment.
3. A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it; a household.
4.
a. An environment offering security and happiness.
b. A valued place regarded as a refuge or place of origin.
5. The place, such as a country or town, where one was born or has lived for a long period.
6. The native habitat, as of a plant or animal.
7. The place where something is discovered, founded, developed, or promoted; a source.
8. A headquarters; a home base.
9.
a. Baseball Home plate.
b. Games Home base.
10. An institution where people are cared for: a home for the elderly.
11. Computer Science
a. The starting position of the cursor on a text-based computer display, usually in the upper left corner of the screen.
b. A starting position within a computer application, such as the beginning of a line, file, or screen or the top of a chart or list.
adj.
1.
a. Of or relating to a home, especially to one's household or house: home cooking; home furnishings.
b. Taking place in the home: home care for the elderly.
2. Of, relating to, or being a place of origin or headquarters: the home office.
3. Sports Relating to a team's sponsoring institution or to the place where it is franchised: a home game; the home field advantage.
4. Of, relating to, or being the keys used as base positions for the fingers in touch-typing: The home row on a standard keyboard consists of the keys for A, S, D, F, J, K, L, and ;.
adv.
1. At, to, or toward the direction of home: going home for lunch.
2. On or into the point at which something is directed: The arrow struck home.
3. To the center or heart of something; deeply: Your comments really hit home.
v. homed, hom·ing, homes
v.intr.
1. To go or return to one's residence or base of operations.
2. To be guided to a target automatically, as by means of radio waves.
3. To move or lead toward a goal: The investigators were homing in on the truth.

transcendence never finalised

looks like...

my future is defenatley CSM.
I'm lucky :)

something about art

I'm afraid it is another roll up roll up not that I have anything to exhibit as of yet....

Monster

She sits in pools of screamd as she waits in the dark for the monster to bite
Her voice is muffled by madness as she rocks and crashes and smashes
His teeth gnashing and slashing
tearing at tears
breaking breath
taking tempation
The deamon in the deep waiting to scare her sleep
Dashing the dreams she once had to stand, walk and dance

Little girl little girl shh it won't hurt
Little girl little girl hold you breath
Little girl little girl their is nothing you can do I'm the killer inside and I'm coming for you

The day is dawning the sun is briht
This nightmare doesn;t go away in the light
The breathing heavy
The pain more intense
Seeing is believing clearness of sight
Dunlight carthartic but not in her mind
The whisper still their
Close your eyes stay inside.

0

walls

White walls echoing minds so transparent nobody knows what they think or feel
The pain to obvious.
Happiness or intrigue blindingly bright.
Grey floors soaking and seeping blury confusionof thought and feeling too misty and muddled to understand.
You can;t quite grasp the meaning.
Nothingness amplified.
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing but something.

A mouse in the corner
Watching and waiting
Scuttling and scurrying
Stifling the screams wanting to explain to shout out what it means.
They know it's in their - you just have to open your eyes
Open your eyes.
Open your eyes.
Open your eyes.
Look behind the picture
The paint know the past
Know the future
Feel the present
In their.... make the time
The atoms of feeling
Fast and furious
Shaking your mind tryng to get you to understand
to accept
to feel what I feel.
But nothing
or EVERYTHING
who knows?
who knows?
Who Knows little mouse?

evil angel

The course of true love never did run smooth.
Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love.

PAPARRAZZZZZIIIII

Ahhhh thank you thank yo thak you universe.
Iam unbeleivably happy. I never thought anthing could feel this way.
Exhibition started.
I love my family.
I love my life.
But most of alll I love my beautiful fiance. The best int the world forever and ever and ever.
The funniest thing I thought i would never be saying this!!!

And who would hav thought that my father would be happy and axting like a embarassing wreck but I think it is fair to say he is actually proud f is daughter and I actully know it. For once I can make him happy by being me.
It is all I ver wanted and I can do it easily.
xxxxx

upwards and onwards

animal expresions

I have a tendancy to see animals in featuresa and facial expressions even if they look nothing like it...

This tends to take my breath away but also reminds me of ant royalty...


And I always eithe loo liek a sheep or a duck.

something about forever..

i love you baby

white shirts

I am loving silver screen androdgeny.
Greta Garbo is a beauty oozing grown up boyishness. A woman instead of a child; Move over Twiggy...

people

Is rather upset and confused to be honest. Maybe irrationally.I don't know it seems rather odd but hten it was obviously going to make me feel uneasy.

But then at least my mind isn't so irrational as to have a reason or a need to shoot harmless people.
Everytime something happens like this there are many sides to the story. The awfulness for the people who have had their lives cut short, the horrible torment for their familes but what about the killer. What possible pain could they have been in?
We as mere people are so fragile. Our emotions hurt us too much and we take that pain and it turns and affects our behaviour. Maybe our minds are too advanced for the stupid situations we find ourselves in. The feeling is far more powerful than the situation and it is so harmful.
Few people are so strong. Few people take everything in their stride. WQe can;t tiptoe around the world but just pray that we can remain on top of things.

A moment to think about those killed, the families and the killers in all mass shootings.

Maybe we should re- read I think we need to talk about kevin

summer

feeling hippiesque

everybody's going to be happy

and i can't wait for summer and this feeling to go on for ever and ever because baby you got me.
I can see country and sunshine and i like towns and cities, crying in the rain, I like everything and I LOVE LIFE.

be there or be square

i'm thining gretta garbo chic