This one was a real film fest...

... yet another video from Shabba - The Visit.

Fun Fest :)

Shabba-Dabba-Da.... Love this !

Love this video from Shabba - The Visit.
I would be the one waving my hands about like a magic person :)
The video is pretty.
I LOVE Shabba :)

Lolita

"Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta. She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita. Did she have a precursor? She did, indeed she did. In point of fact, there might have been no Lolita at all had I not loved, one summer, an initial girl- child. In a princedom by the sea."

  - Vladimis Nabakov, Lolita

The Eye

From day to day it stays
Looking
Looking
Looking
Open and seeing.
Disconnected from the bloodless body and keep the secrets inside.
Open and shut.
Open and shut.
Open and shut.
Open and shut.
What glass sees it must hide.
Flashing glimpses
Hazy murmurs of hedonistic sin.

White light.
White stark light.
The eye running being chased by chaos
Stormless searching -
The storms eye.
Searching for visible life.

Don't turn it off.
Don't turn it off.

Secret's can't be kept.
Memories not so precious when pushed though bloods gauze.
                                                                                              
Disconnected I.
Disconnected eye.

Jewless separation.
Camera catches what you don't know.
I didn't see.
See or
ACT?

Mirror. Mirror. Mirror.
Crack
Crack
Crack
Glass glare.
I can't see it anymore.
Right or Wrong?
Right or Wrong?

Oh well I will just put it down as experience.
A lustful landscape on life.

Do i ignore the facts and just shut it in behind the mask?
This obscurity that I don't understand.
Flowing Glimpses
Hidden Glimpses

Eyelash
Skin
Flesh
Bone
Blood
Skin
Iris
Blood
Skin
Skin
Gory scarred skin.

The eye.
Don't shut it.
Don't shut it.
Somebody turn out the lights.

Addiction

I am addicted to sex.
I am addicted to love.
I am addicted to being loved.
I am addicted to people.
I am addicted to exercise.
I am addicted to alcohol.
I am addicted to parties.
I am addicted to sleep.
I am addicted to routine.
I am addicted to drama.
I am addicted to emotion.
I am addicted to control.
I am addicted to destruction.
I am addicted to you.
I am addicted to me.

Some of these are more abstract than others.
Some are more serious.
They all play with each other.
Maybe this means things are better... Addiction with compromise?

I don't know.
It is hard.

horns with words

Reality

Not what I wanted or expected
This dream is one
Colourful
Hazy
Reality.
Sorry for the pain
the slashing burning stabbing pain for you and me.
Because it is over.
Has to be . had to be. it remains.

This happened becuase of
love?
One could die
or love the stars to much -
The night fucks it up.

It wont stop but this is one scary beginning.
Running out or into control
Who knows?

Turning round and calling quits
Beautiful day.
Lightness
Never forgotton.
That which is always scarred in my skin.
Branded past and future.
Young love? Beautiful

I am smiling. Smiling at rainbows before it is too late.
Dancing
Dancing
Dancing
For you.
For our happiness.

Slaughter over and peace will last.. maybe?
Yes or no
Yes or No
Yes or NO
Running out of time running with the wind
The memories remain in their space .

Don't step away.

Shabba Dabba IX - The Visit

Another Shabba... another great night. This time in a new venue  - At The Shoreditch -
Tempted to say it was even better than normal. AND FAR LESS EMBARASSING

Thank you James for the lovely KISS :)

In Memory of Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor died yesterday in her sleep aged 79 with her family all around her. 

Her death marks the end of her great Hollywood era and she will be remembered as a star and for her AIDS activism. Dame Elizabeth Taylor was one of the great women of the golden age. It is sad to think this time is over. 

A time when stars were really stars.

An aside note : I can't believe I have had no time to write anything on my blog this week. I have been insanely busy and barely had any time to sleep in my own bead. Let alone anything else. On an note of acting.. My play is on Friday :)

saying goodbye to the babies

As some of you may know I have had at least one mouse in my house (crummy room) for a very long time! This sounds horrific but I got used to it and really couldn't bring myself to set traps and send them out in to the cold. Anyway as friendly as they are it got a bit much when they would be rustling all night and a tiny bit on the messy side! Quite recently it seems the family got larger and babies were born. This had to be it and the weather is warmer... so they wont freeze to death?
I set my humane traps and low and behold... (haha ) they very quickly filled up. The mice were very very cute and I set them free in to the wide wide world. I hope they are ok!

saying goodbye to the babies

As some of you may know I have had at least one mouse in my house (crummy room) for a very long time! This sounds horrific but I got used to it and really couldn't bring myself to set traps and send them out in to the cold. Anyway as friendly as they are it got a bit much when they would be rustling all night and a tiny bit on the messy side! Quite recently it seems the family got larger and babies were born. This had to be it and the weather is warmer... so they wont freeze to death?
I set my humane traps and low and behold... (haha ) they very quickly filled up. The mice were very very cute and I set them free in to the wide wide world. I hope they are ok!

YES

I am no longer going to say NO to anything. I am going to do EVERYTHING. I am going to LIVE. To fill EVERY minute.

NO more SATURDAY nights alone crying with my broken heart.
EVERYone will know the real me... HOWEVER UGLY

I am going to spend MONEY
LIVE
DANCE
DO
push myself
no push myself
taste everything

No more living for THAT happiness
Find NEW happiness / or maybe not just try

I may come out of it with nothing
BUT i need to do this now
IT MAY be an EVITA case.
I am young
Free
SAY YES



See what happens.
I AM not saying it is right.

(p.s no asking for sexual favours!)

Praying for Japan

I don't think there is anybody who isn't currently aware of the devastating crisis happening now in Japan.
It is a time where we must all pray or wish for those directly and indirectly affected as well as for the world itself. This is a time when humanity must pull together.
Unfortunately humans are of the nature that they are always causing crisis themselves but when the natural world turns on us and fights back this has to be a wake up call. I am no expert on natural disasters, climate change e.t.c but the world itself is a powerful force that I feel we has humans all too readily ignore! We cannot continue to fight against our planet.
I am not one to speculate in the "end of the world" or live in fear of 2012 ( if only because that would mean the remainder of my life was spent waiting for the end!) but there is no doubt that one way or another we are destroying our planet. Yes there have always been natural disasters from volcanoes to floods but it does seem that the scale of events is getting far more epic and unpredictable. It is not so long ago since our last great Tsunami ... happenings that we seem unable to predict in our scientific and measured world.
Now on to the nuclear crisis. We seem to have made this disaster worse by throwing the deadliest of weapons into this sideless war. Again it seems our atomic capabilities have been thrown back at us and yet again Einstein would be turning in his grave. This is no firing of missiles or atomic bomb but the result of the damage to the nuclear plant caused by the devastation is still incredibly dangerous. I understand that nuclear science is forefront and could hold the road to better energy resources and helpful sciences but the danger, wars, power battles and destruction seem to much. Humans have not got capable hands to handle such material.
We have nothing to do now but raise support, wish and pray for those in Japan and for the world itself. Humans have already shown incredible goodness and proved they can work for the greater good. It is heartbreaking to here of the workers in the nuclear plant fighting for everyones safety. Heartbreaking and beautiful. We in England are incredibly lucky to be safe and currently unaffected (as a country physically) by these natural happenings but we do not know what is in store.
It is hard for me to write about this because I , of course, no nothing but I do still care. About this and many other events.
Every time something like this happens we have a wave of perspective forced upon us. I would just like to ask that we try to make this remain with us and also that we don't forget about all of this in a couple of weeks. The rebuilding in Japan will go on for years.

The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it.

I forgot how much this is my very very very favouritist book. Packed with Oscar Wilde genius.. can you even go a sentence without recognising genius.
I implore you to read the book.

What a way to live life!


This old trailer is frightfully dramatic!

I don;t know about evil and sin... but i will forever be in love with Dorian Gray.

Blow Job

I have no time to write anything. Think what you will. It is staged reality. Beautiful. And I will always love it.

Belongs in the factory...

I do not want to be alive now. I belong to 1960s New York.
Please send me back.

... exert form "Poor Little Rich Girl"


... exert form chelsea girls.

It is not that I want to be someone else. I want to be me. I just think i was born in the wrong time. Everything about me gravitates towards then.
This modern world is too confusing and I hate it.
It isn't romantic nostalgia ... it is a yearning a loss.. a bit like waiting for your soulmate.

rhinocerous

Anyone wellcome..
It is a bit obsurd!

Mad Girl's Love Song

Mad Girl's Love Song 

I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead; 
I lift my lids and all is born again. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red, 
And arbitrary blackness gallops in: 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed 
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade: 
Exit seraphim and Satan's men: 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 

I fancied you'd return the way you said, 
But I grow old and I forget your name. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

I should have loved a thunderbird instead; 
At least when spring comes they roar back again. 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.)" 
— Sylvia Plath

Don't

"don't say no to me you can't say no to me because it's such a relief to have love again and to lie in bed and be held and touched and kissed and adored and your heart will leap when you hear my voice and see my smile and feel my breath on your neck and your heart will race when I want to see you and I will lie to you from day one and use you and screw you and break your heart because you broke mine first and you will love me more each day until the weight is unbearable and your life is mine and you'll die alone because I will take what I want then walk away and owe you nothing it's always there it's always been there and you cannot deny the life you feel fuck that life fuck that life fuck that life I have lost you now." 
Sarah Kane, Crave

Darkness Imprint

Point Blanc

For Love
For Truth
For Freedom
For Lies
For Hate
For Beauty
For Pain
For Power
For Art
For Feeling
For Blood
For Life

night dreams

Tracy Emin and Louise Borgeouis

 An interesting collabration...
The communication is astounding.
Currently on a Hauser and Wirth

Chains

Pulsing tendon holding and churning
Chords of freedom we cannot break
Chains binding our wrists
our ankles
Our hearts
Our minds.
Wrapped together in discordant harmony
Pulling - a futile effort wrapped in the ties that are there.
Precious metal gripping bondage dreams.
Time is useless
Time apart - isn't real.
Hearts of human steal
Yet hearts so real
You know what you did
No words are necessary yet you need to scream them from your lungs.
You broke something
But you can't break these ropes of fire that bind my blood and keep my mind alive.

Both twisted and struck and pulled at these chains
Stabbing heart.
Stabbing blood.
What disastrous torment we caused ourselves in this immature mess!
These chains don't break
Chains of choice but not chains of meaning
They are just there holding us in some god forsaken purgatory
Pull apart and spring back together
Twist and turn
blood bound
mind bound
body bound
heart bound
soul bound binds
Don't break.
Don't break.
Don't break.
No escape.

hot stuff...

Supreme - Lady Gaga shot by Terry Richardson from simon cahn on Vimeo.

It is clear that these two work well together.. no surprises there!
Terry Richardson <3

... and i really need to do something on fashion week but i am sooo busy...
LOVE

I love this!

I love this song it - it is on the Jimmy Choo advert at the moment and I had to look for it.
It just makes me feel :)

Water

...another experimentation with sound and image.

Themes of LOVE

AAAA-AAAA-aaaa experimentation (self portrait as therapy) after Marina Abromavic

Aaaa-Aaaa-Aaaa experimentation (Self Portrait after Marina Abramovic) from Elizabeth Ophelia Alice Rose on Vimeo.

An experimentation after Marina Abromavic's  and Ulay's work "AAA AAA".
A piece of work in it's own right - as a performer and an artist I justify remaking other artists work by placing myself within it in order to create something new or contrasting. None of us can do anything the same. I am not stealing a concept but trying to "feel" it. A performer plays a character.. perhaps I am the generic character of an artist?

This is obviously also personal and a self-portrait as I am in it. The screaming is an emotion although the lack of words takes out language. The scream is universal. With the scream we revert to animalistic qualities .. the reaction can be disturbing or humorous. For me... I am not objective so I would liek some feedback.

This was just an experimentation. The setting is wrong.. it was cold and windy. The clothes wrong... (we were cold) but it still has the raw humanistic and natural qualities. I would like to experiment with removing sound but for now here goes ...