Saucepans and things

We are cursed beings at this moment. Do I bring bad luck? Is it something to do with ones being? Whatever... I just spent the last hour shaving my bike and bashing it with a sauce pan. Why? Unexplainable to the average human being. Average meaning everyone who isn't me. I know my life is a lot better than so many. I do have things in perspective. It is why I just keep going. But. I could do with a fairy god mother right now.